I was coming around a right hand bend and noticed there was an injured barn owl sitting on the side of the road so I pulled over and started walking back to have a look. Next minute this old dude came along and panicked. He had a confused look on his face and jumped on the brakes and steered directly at me. I jumped up the kerb and he missed me by a whisker. Luckily for the owl he missed it too.

I asked him what the fuck was he doing and he said he thought I was a copper asking him to stop.

Maybe you look like one Beag's , you got a snout like a pig,  wear a blue hat and march around making sure no one has fun?.

Well I've got another one !

I was driving a semi trailer down the Hume Highway one very foggy morning. The fog was particularly thick as I approached the Marulan Weigh Station so I was going slow looking for the exit. When I turned off I vaguely noticed a bit of commotion on the highway.   Turned out that an Indian chap who was driving a B - double missed the exit and stopped and tried to reverse back to the Weigh Station. The next car to come along drove up his arse but the curry muncher didnt know he had been hit and kept reversing.

Apparently he kept reversing and pushed the car back to the exit. Luckily by that stage another truck had come along and got on the radio and explained to the Indian fellow the error of his ways in no uncertain terms.

Luckily nobody got hurt.  

Did he have to pay the bill ?

OH hell! That bought back memories I didn't want back.

Years ago heading north out of Sydney during peak hour along the Pacific Hwy. Had just swapped trailers and was heading home, got caught behind a L plater who kept tapping the brakes instead of easy off the pedal every time they drifted over the speed limit. Just as we got near the Ourimbah exit the traffic in all lanes came to a screeching stop. Jump on the brakes and truck starts slowing but not as fast as it should. Realizing I had no chance of stopping I took the exit, Whew relief! Then an OH Shit moment when approaching the roundabout knowing that I wouldn't get around. Take the left exit, Whew relief again, then another OH Shit! A picnic ground!. By this time I had managed to slow to around fast walking pace. Ended up stopped in picnic ground with people standing around gawking. While sitting behind the wheel trying to stop sweating an old fella came over and asked if I was ok and would I like a beer which I needed but declined. Transport showed up and inspected truck and trailer, turned out the trailer had failed an inspection a few days earlier and rego had been canceled which I had no knowledge of and a false plate was attached. Rang the boss to tear him a new one when one of the inspectors grabbed the phone and did it for me. Ex boss copped a huge fine and lucky me got to bob-tail back to Brisbane without any punishment.

I had a very close call on that stretch of road, just North of the Wyong services. 

I was driving a quad axle tipper fully loaded with coal for Vales Point power station.  

I  was creeping up on the truck in front and was waiting for a chance to get past him.

I ended up right on his arse and got a break in the traffic so I started pulling out into the fast lane. Just as I did this the truck in front pulled hard to the left onto the hard shoulder and there was a row of stationary cars sitting in the slow lane less than 100 meters ahead. I passed safely in the fast lane and old mate in front passed safely on the hard shoulder at 100 kph.

At the time I just thought " fuck !  That was lucky" but the more I thought about it the more spooked I got.

If I had waited another 2 seconds to pull out it could have been a totally different story. 

I don't know if I would have had the presence of mind to follow him onto the hard shoulder or if I would have panicked and jumped on the brakes. That wouldn't have ended well cos it takes more than 100 meters to pull up 50.5 tons.

It turned out that there was a minor grass fire on the median strip up ahead and that's why the traffic stopped on the freeway. 

It spooked me that badly I ended up going back on the tools for about 3 years. I am driving trucks again now but still think about it. 

Looks like we have a few truck driver stories.

I had a not very enjoyable encounter with a cattle truck about 15 years ago, heading north on the Newell Highway, south of Coonabarabran.

Maybe mid afternoon and I came up behind this cattle truck on the bike. Not much fun sitting behind one of them with all the piss and shit coming out the back, and wearing an open face helmet, so I dropped back a bit and was looking for a chance to overtake.

We get to an overtaking lane and I pulled out into the overtaking lane and was about halfway up the side of him when he decided to pull out and overtake a couple of cars in the left hand lane. So I was forced out onto the double white lines, with traffic in the oncoming lane. 

I gave her a bit more throttle and as I went past the cab I looked up and gave him the finger and an earful. I was pretty close to the cab but he probably didn't hear what I said. I reckon he had a fair idea.

I stayed on the throttle and put a bit more distance between us and then realised I would have to stop in town for fuel.

I was filling the tank and looking down the road for the truck, thinking this is going to get interesting if he pulls in here.

But I never saw him again.

 Good fuckin story  Hilly.

Reminds me of the time down the Snowy Mountains I accidentally parked a Toyota Hilux ute up against a big gum tree halfway down a fuckin cliff.

This particular night there was three of us and one of the blokes said he knew a great fishing spot but it's a bit of a hike to get in there.

No fuckin worries.

We were enjoying the beers and old mate pulled out a big joint. It was the good stuff. We lost track of time and realised it was pitch fuckin black and nobody remembered where the ute was so we stumbled through the bush for a while until we found it.

We were all pretty whacked but somebody had to drive and for whatever reason I got the job. It was pretty rugged country and I was unfamiliar with the track and as we approached a particularly steep gully old mate told me I needed to pick up some speed going down so I would make it up the other side.  So I floored it.

 Everything was going well until we got to the top and the ute launched into the air.

The track went to the left but we went straight ahead down the mountain. It was a wild ride for a hundred yards or so until I hit a big gum tree head on.

It was lucky we did hit the tree cos if we had went another 100 yards we would have went off a cliff.

We had to walk back to town and got there just as all the other fellas were getting on the bus to go to work. 

It was a bit awkward explaining to the boss that the company ute was parked out in the bush up against a gum tree.

Let's see? Combination longer than 30 metres. Check

Road Train signs attached,  Check

Dolly attached between trailers. Check

Yep, me thinks that is classed as a Road Train

Down here in NSW we would have put the ammonia and water into 44 gallon drums and chucked it in a box trailer and took it to the tip.

I see stupid stuff nearly every day !